10 Things I Have Learned Over the Years
I’m turning 18 on November 11th. The thought that I’m going to be an adult in a few days is kind of scaring me a little. I kind of feel like I’m being fully thrown into the world to figure out things for myself. Even though I have my family to help me with things, I’m still will be an adult in the eyes of the law. So I just wanted to share some lessons that I have learned so far.
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Patience
I would say that patience is something that I've had to learn. Especially when I have dealt with acne since middle school, I've learned that one day my skin will get better but it obviously takes time to get it to that sort of place. Also even with my natural hair journey. It takes a long time for your hair to adjust to get back to its natural state after being damaged for so long. So in my mind, I just think “it'll all be worth it in the end and when it gets the point, you're going to feel so good.”
2. “We never get through this life alone”
This is something that my mother always says. And after hearing it so many times, I guess it's true. People always need somebody to help them through something or to have a shoulder to lean on. Or just even to talk to somebody. It's always nice for somebody to have that. I always go to somebody I trust for problems that I'm doing what's or if I'm having a hard time with something. Especially in the world we're living in now, everybody needs to be kind and trusting with each other.
3. Always do your research
When I say this, I usually mean for like products that help you with your health/skin Because you don't want to buy something that you don't know anything about and it doesn't end up working for you. But I can meet for anything. Like a certain type of phone or a certain type of meal. Especially if it cost a lot of money. It would cost that much money then it better be good for whatever I'm using it for. So always do your research because you don't want to get something that is bootleg.
4. Wear SPF
I literally can't stress this enough. Wearing SPF is highly important. Especially if you're dealing with hyperpigmentation or using something that makes your skin sensitive to light. If you don't wear SPF, it will really damage your skin or even cause skin cancer. So, I'm always telling my friends to wear it and they always laugh at me because a common misconception is that African-Americans don’t have to wear sunscreen; which is false. Everyone has to wear sunscreen whenever you're in direct sunlight.
5. Trust/know yourself
I would say it took me a long time to figure out who I am as a person. Like what some of my texts are or how I react to certain situations. even though we change every single day, knowing or at least having an idea of who you are will help you with your confidence and being more comfortable in certain situations. Like I discovered that I don't do well in big crowds so I try to stay away from those.
6. Being a push-over
I tell my brother this all the time. You can not let people run over you or make you feel little about yourself nowadays. I remember hearing someone say, “If they feel like they have the power to say something to you, then you have the power to say something back.” This is something I still have a hard time with; just because I don’t like having problems with people. But if something is happening, you have to stand up for yourself or help others.
7. Don’t spend so much time on social media
This world is so into social media, it’s toxic. I just found out that my total screen time per-week was 36 hours and 2 minutes. Even though I spend some of my time reading, Instagram, youtube, and twitter are a huge factor as well. I spend around 18 hours on social media apps per-week. Something that puts me in a good mood is going outside at least once a day. Just getting some fresh air really helps me. So I’ll start doing that more.
8. Don’t assume things
I'm the type that likes to think deeply about things. I don't like to assume things about people because I don't always know the full story about why some people might act a certain way or why they look a certain way. You never know if somebody's having a bad day or just going through something bad in their life. So that's why I was trying to be friendly to people. Showing my emotions is very hard for me just from past experience and I have had people be scared of me because they thought that I hated them when they first met me because I wasn't smiling or I wasn't showing expression in my face. That's something I definitely want to change. I feel like I'm an awkward person when I first meet people but when I get comfortable that's when you'll see the full me.
9. Think about the full picture
What I mean by this is don't always think that there's one solution to something. I always say that people don't fully understand something if they don't go through it themselves. For example, I'm going to talk about acne a little bit. I've been dealing with cystic acne since I was in the fifth grade and I've always had people make fun of me for or tell me I should wash my face or keep on doing a bunch of stuff that wasn't working for me. When I got on this medication and my acne started to get better, I started to see myself thinking the things that other people were saying about what I should have done. Like “oh I don't know why she just doesn't do this.”, but then I would go back to thinking about the time when I tried something like that and it didn't work for me.
10. Being an adult and mature are 2 different things
I am very proud to say that I am a very mature person. I am also glad that I found a group of friends that are mature as well and from seeing how certain adults acted around us, it was really embarrassing for us to watch. We would see adults acting wild on social media or at school all the time and we would talk about it within a group. So even though some people are adults they're not fully mature which is just crazy to even think about. So basically, mind your business and keep it moving unless it has to do anything with you.
